The truth

....Saying 'I chose you' would mean I had a choice. the truth lies within me...

I stole the above line from my friend (i hold my breath as i lay claim on friendship with this wordsmith) His work can be found at http://be-nyamezele.blogspot.com .

First time i read that line, it blew me away like very few lines can...It made me think how simple life is and how complicated it feels.

Feelings and reality, oil and water.

We all have a choice...Most of us prefer to take the easier path and not choose at all. We console ourselves with notions of predestination and fate.

The truth lies within you...

You can choose. You just choose not to...

Thank you Bulumko...

Song of the day: One Republic- Secrets

David Gray "This Years Love"

I think this is the perfect song to close the year...may this year's love last always for y'all

M to the Rescue

I dressed for work in the dark today. Thanks to PHCN and their disregard for young ladies living alone who do not understand the mechanics of the changing engine oil, servicing generators and change overs.

I was very sure something was wrong and even after checking myself out in as many rear view mirrors as i could manage, i still felt under dressed....till i walked into M's office and he gave me a slow lingering once over...and smiled that smile designed to break hearts.

Suddenly everything was right with the world...

Happy new year in advance people...i have a good feeling about this one...

Song of the day(no thinking twice about this one...): Asa- Bimpe(i get a kick off singing the first three lines to co-workers...they end up laughing at my accent)

Mo' Dele

Mo'dele came home like the prodigal child

Sores from all over the place on her body

Scars I didn't dare to question their source

She came home and like the father in the story

I opened my doors and my heart to her again

Only I am not her father

I am the man who loves her like none other

I am the man in the shadows

I am the one poised to catch her when she falls

I am a miserable man

Mo'dele left again one morning

Like the restless falcon that has a home only in the next hunt

She left me a penciled note that said 'thank you'

And a sweater to warm my nights

There was no need to search for my heart

It was long gone

I am a miserable man

Glad to wallow in my misery

Because within it lies hope

That someday she will be back

And maybe it will be to stay

Till then, Mo'dele,

Till, you come home

P.s Mo'dele is Yoruba for 'I have come home'. I find more and more, home is hard to recognize for so many!

Song of the day: Boyzone- Everyday i love you

Picture perfect

I have stopped paying much attention to Facebook. Ever since i learned that nothing is as it seems and all the picture perfect lives i see are just as broken and incomplete as mine. 

Nothing is ever as it seems. Cameras can hide the pain, hide the sadness, hide the division, ....paint a happier life than we can ever live...

I went through loads of my pictures and each told a different story than i know was true and i wondered how much longer before the can  of worms is opened and the facade lost forever...Facebook, Hi5, Myspace ...All of them scream out loud how happy and complete we all are...and yet there are wars and disease and deaths and divorces and breakups and shame. Do they happen only to people not on Facebook? Are we immune just because our lives are lived on web-pages?

I think its alright we want to forget so long as we remember what is real and what is not. Its when we lose sight of that that we are lost.

Song of day: UB40 - Many rivers to cross

'Tis the season

So its Christmas...

I had almost forgotten till i went to Falomo and the amazing Xmas decorations reminded me.(Well done, Church of Assumption!!!)

Last Christmas was amazing..Calabar and friends and self discovery...

This year, i don't know what to do with myself...the man i love is zillions of miles away and our hearts are fraught with cuts-deep and shallow....lets just say this Christmas , love isn't in the air

There will be no Calabar-one vacation per year please...My account is still bearing the brunt of London...

Friends?!! Oh boy!!! I can count my friends on one hand and they are millions of miles away.

Still...I have  a good feeling about this one...

There is family and its been a while we all spent Xmas together. it might also be the last time in a  long time as school and new families call.

There are new folks i look forward to making friends with and Tee might just be spending Xmas in Lagos. There is still the euphoria of London and all the lovely shopping i got to do.

There is presents...and that's the best part...the giving .and (pardon me), the receiving. i know loads of people say its better to give than to receive but i think its a two way street...you give and you will get..i look forward to both ends.

This year i want to try the orphanage...Its time i do something for someone that really needs it..i am hoping i can convince my colleagues at the office to join me and make a ball out of it...

Merry Christmas everyone...and GIVE...