Wale...

And i thought i was so over it...

Just so happens that i am not and i never will be...i have a  feeling i will be eighty and will think of you and still bawl...

Its barely 9am and i thought of you and almost didn't make it to the bathroom before the waterworks let loose...Like a child i bawled and shook my fists at the heavens...yes i am still mad, yes i  still ask why...

I freaking miss you...i want you to be here, i so need you to be here...albeit for selfish reasosn,but i need you...

I wish you were here so i could surprise you and send you a cake or flowers or call you and tell you how much i love you...

I wish i had a recent picture that would show off my mother with the beautiful doe eyes, the pouty lips and the heart that shone through her eyes...

I miss you ma...there are times i feel so lost, so unattached, so alone...like i belong to no one, to nothing...you were my anchor...

Now i am the anchor...but i am not you and no matter how hard i try, i still falter...

Your babies are fine...i am fine but as incomplete as cake without icing, as a Christmas tree without lights...

Rest well babes...

Song of the day: Aaliyah - Miss you